Rites of Passage
If you have been keeping up with No Off Season (NOS4Dads), you know that I write on the behalf of two boys. They are now 20 and 16. They are at an age where a level of independence is expected and maturity is required. However, those to facets of life are not always projected. I am still dealing with immaturity, character flaws, unnecessary attitudes, and any other thing you can think of that may come from boys. Please do not get me wrong — if I put them in the workforce right now, they would thrive! One lives on their own and both have run programs and operations in their schools, but they are still boys. That’s why I am convinced that they need a village. And at a certain age, they need to go through a Rites of Passage.
By definition, a rites of passage is ‘a ceremony or event marking an important stage in someone’s life, especially birth, puberty, marriage, and death.‘ We got the idea from our church pastors years ago, as they performed a similar ceremony with all three of their boys. We duplicated the idea, both when they turned 16. On both occasions, their ‘village’ showed up and spoke tremendous life into them. Their village consisted of our close friends, the boys’ closest friends, framily (friends that are truly family) and some people within our community. They spoke to their pursuit in education, the value of true friendships and relationships, and to the value of their faith. They spoke to their culture and history and how to be proud of their blackness. They were given artifacts for them to use to remember that time and who they are. And finally, after cake and pictures,pomp and circumstance, we prayed. We prayed over their faith, education, friendships, careers, and the like. The ceremonies for both boys were truly inspiring, uplifting, funny, serious, and needed.
I’m hoping that they don’t forget those moments. I want them to reflect on those times as hallmarks of growth and faith. I and my wife are making all efforts to raise men of God, kings, and men of character. This has been a challenge since they first cried from the womb. And as long as I am alive, I will have this responsibility of raising these boys. My friends, I have No Off Season.
